Thursday, July 06, 2006

The Long road to finding home

Back in the houston area and trying to re-learn my way around. Its odd to me i have only been gone a year and i look around and sooo much has changed. things that were always there are gone, places that were fields are now strip centers. Yet it is the same city, i have left the house 2x now to go meet people out and try to make contacts in my search to be gainfully employed in a stable manner again.... wow has that been a while,and try to keep my sanity.
Home is good, but i remembered the pitfalls of knowing alot of people. the 4th of july was family time, something i was suprised i missed as much as i did.

God how those kids have grown. God how i missed playing with them. I sat with my brother in law and heard him tell me how i need to get my old self back. How he loved to live vicariously through me. Theres the pitfall i have no intent on stepping back into it. I could go straight to rock-star lifestyle here quickly, but then the lessons of the year are wasted.

Took 3 moves and alot of bumps to make one big circle around this country. When i left I only really cared about work/career, image to a degree, money in the bank and the stuff in my house. Well most of that is gone, and i find i do not care. I made a great big circle to find humility, family, something that matter more than anything i could ever buy, no matter how fat the wallet becomes. 3 moves to find the true Adult me, yes i can still be obnoxious, yes i can still get outlandish, but when its time to go to sleep at night, when i wake in the morning, whenever i look in a mirror, i can now see the next step in the journey. I truly know where home exists. Anyone wanna grab my hand and go for a walk?


At 10:04 AM, Blogger Rantirator said...

*raises hand*

At 10:34 AM, Blogger thephoenixnyc said...

I know you hate when I show emotion and all that kind of stuff, but this post may be the single most beautiful thing I have ever seen you write, in any forum.

Its nice to seee you surrounded by the kids again.

Its even better that you recognise the journey was the desitnation.


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